Wednesday, April 01, 2009

SteveChat - Episode 9

I need to explain a few things before you read this one...

1) A few nights earlier, we were at a party.
2) It was some drunk chick's birthday.
3) She was annoying.
4) She banged our friend Justin.
5) Several hours later, she banged his roommate Boyko.
6) A few hours after her second banging, her mother called to tell her that her grandfather had just died.

You seriously can't make this shit up. Naturally, Steve and I had some things to say on the matter...

Sleepo285: jesus christ
Sleepo285: her grandfather probably died because she was such a whore
Sleepo285: is that mean?
TyQuiF: nah, it's karma
Sleepo285: i bet after he died earlier that night, he got to heaven and decided "well i should check on my family on earth and keep an eye on them, protect them from harm and all that good stuff... ok, there's my son sleeping next to his wife, everything looks good there.... there's my brother playing late night cribbage at the old folks home.... OH MY GOD MY GRANDDAUGHTER IS GETTING NAILED ON A COUCH BY JEREMY BOYKO!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!"
TyQuiF: oh man, i'm sure its not good to make light or speak ill of the dead but that was fucking hilarious
Sleepo285: its ok
Sleepo285: its what he would have wanted
TyQuiF: who wouldnt
Sleepo285: "itsz myyy birtthdayzxslkdf"
Sleepo285: thats all i remember about that girl
Sleepo285: that and when she spilled beer on me
TyQuiF: hahhaha
Sleepo285: oh shit her grandfather died on her birthday
Sleepo285: but she also got fucked by boyko on her birthday
TyQuiF: gonna be a night to remember
Sleepo285: bittersweet memories
Sleepo285: i wonder if its just coincidence... cause if its not, and when boyko fucks someone their grandfather dies, thats pretty awesome
Sleepo285: he could start an internet porn site...
TyQuiF: imagine all the hits
TyQuiF: it'd be like milfhunter but with a nice twist on the end... he blasts all over the girl's face and then says "HAHA - your grandfather's dead now!!"
Sleepo285: hahaha
Sleepo285: it's like in bang bus when they ditch the chick on the side of the road
Sleepo285: theres nothing better than sex with a twist ending
Sleepo285: "yeah meg, this was really great... i've never felt so aLIVE FROM NEW YORK ITS SATURDAY NIGHT!!!"
TyQuiF: dude, next time (if ever) i bang a chick... after i finish, i just wanna whisper softly in her ear... "your grandfather just died"



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