Cast Away Proble--AWW SHIT!

It's very likely that someone has already made mention of this somewhere on the internet or at least in casual conversation, but nevertheless, I have to say it anyways. Just to be sure.

Remember the movie Cast Away with Tom Hanks? Decent flick. A little quiet. Beach scenes were nice. I don't think the director gave the volleyball enough lines, but that's Hollywood for ya. Anyways, does everyone here remember that package he held onto? Seriously, you don't? For fuck's sake. Alright, he's a FedEx employee flying over the Pacific, shit crashes, he survives, and wakes up on a beach on a deserted island. Here's what wikipedia says from there:

"After several FedEx packages from the crashed plane wash up on the island, Chuck begins to open them, looking for items to use for his survival. He finds a number of potentially useful items but leaves one package, painted with a pair of wings, unopened."

So he never ends up opening the package, makes it off the island, and delivers the fucker to some lady at the end. Or something triumphant and happy or whatever. Here's what gets me: what if there was something extremely useful? Like a satellite phone.

Oh fuck me. I just scrolled further down on the wikipedia page and found this:

"In a panel discussing the movie, director Robert Zemeckis joked that the unopened package contained a waterproof, solar-powered satellite phone. This led to a Super Bowl commercial that parodied the movie, which shows Chuck (though not played by Hanks) delivering the unopened package; as he does so, he asks the recipient 'by the way, what's in the package?' and she replies 'nothing much, just a satellite phone, GPS locator, fishing rod, water purifier, and some seeds.'"

Well, that totally ruins my joke. Typical Q. Steal jokes from your sub-conscious memories. Real mature, asshole.