Thursday, March 12, 2009

Links On The Left, Part 4

First of all, have any of you noticed that all of the links happen to be on the right side of the page? Sure, I'm a colossal fucking moron for that, but I assumed that among the three of you reading out there, you could've figured that one out. I can't hold your hands through everything...

Anyways, today I am talking about CrossFit is a General Physical Preparedness (GPP) program that has essentially changed my life. With any luck, I'll drop this shithole government job and open my own gym someday. Just like White Goodman.

CrossFit's basic principles revolve around Constantly Varied Functional Movements Executed at High Intensity. Basically, it's harder than whatever you're currently doing. CrossFit's definition of fitness is increased work capacity across broad time and modal domains. The ability to move large loads quickly in a variety of ways is fitness, so to speak. Sure, Lance Armstrong can ride a bike for days, but I wouldn't ask the guy to shovel my driveway during a nor'easter. Dude's a fuckin' stringbean. Meanwhile, the douche-bag meathead at your local gym may be able to bench press 500 pounds, but I'll bet he can't do more than 10 pull-ups. Better yet, I guarantee he can't run a sub-8 minute mile.

The idea of CrossFit is to be good at everything. Fitness-related only, unfortunately. If only it made people better at nailing countless numbers of women...

Just the other day, I did a 30 minute workout in which I ended up doing 120 pull-ups, 120 ring dips, and 345 sit-ups. Shit was brutal. Even worse were the two raspberries I got on the top of my ass cheeks. My shit was rubbed raw. It looks like attempted entry wounds.

I felt a lot like this...

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At 8:40 AM , Blogger Drew said...

I don't know what I'm more upset about. The fact that you didn't respond to my lengthy email that I sent you or the fact that you chose to post something about Crossfit rather than reply to my email about Crossfit. Either way, know that I'm pissed.

This is the problem with blogs. Everyone thinks that a blog where they write random shit makes them some kind of journalist or big shot. Well let me tell you something, Agent Pissant (If there's anyone who will understand a strange Chris Kattan movie reference, I'm sure it's you). You ain't no journalist and you ain't no bigshot.

But, with regards to your most recent post about, I liked it. Thanks for the reading material for when I got into work. There's no snow in Utah or Vermont this week, so I had no good news on any of the other sites I checked out this morning. This was excellent. You need to get home for some WODs soon. Dupuis and I could use the kick in the ass.



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