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In case you were wondering...


I'm worried about this BP oil crisis. Something like 152 MILLION gallons leaked so far. This is tragic. My biggest concern: will any of that gas ever find its way into my car?


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P.S. Widgets are fun!

Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


I just worked an internet fraud case in which the item that was never paid for was a model of a fucking Imperial Walker. The offender used the name "Jamal Lewis" in email correspondence. Oh, and when the victim provided a picture of the guy who screwed him? Yeah, it was a picture of Ron Jaworski.


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Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


Whenever I kill a bug, I typically don't clean up the remains. I leave them sitting there for a while to serve as a warning to all of the other bugs. Just like Vlad The Impaler, bitches!


And now you know.

Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


Anyone on a sports team called the "Flames" is gay. Take that, Jarome Iginla!


And now you know.

Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


I just watched Mike Huckabee play bass alongside Bernie Williams' band and it's like I just took five pills of Viagra - this boner is here to stay!


And now you know.

Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


I don't like the way the dispeners in the bathroom here at work squirt soap on my hands. It makes me feel like I just jerked off the sink.


And now you know.

Now You Know

In case you were wondering...


Girls who use this quote: "Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you can't change. Kiss slowly, play hard, forgive quickly, take chances, give everything and have no regrets. Life's too short to be anything but happy" are whores.


And now you know.